Saturday, May 28, 2005

What is the deal with....

Disney characters who go asking some supernatural creature for help, or put themselves voluntarily in the midst of danger, and then when the inevitable happens and the creature responds or the danger gets to crisis level, they always (and when I say always, I mean ALWAYS!!) get this look of utter surprise on their face, as if to say, "How did this happen??" Well, duh...

Toys R Us. What a frickin' scary place this is. Bad lighting; crap everywhere; the smell of cheap plastic permeating the air; something being pumped through the vents that permeates your veins and causes the oxygen in your blood to shrink so that you become tired, slow down, and lose all track of time. You buy things just so you can escape, not because you're in some lovely atmosphere that made you happy and calm and put you in a buying mood. No -- you go in for a birthday present for some kid, and just grab the first thing you can find, just so you can get the hell out. Nevermind that whatever it is costs 50 bucks and the kid is your kid's casual acquaintance. This place is like the 6th level of hell right here on Earth.

Spiders. My dad used to always say, "They're more afraid of you than you are of them." Somehow, this would have been more effective coming from man who didn't freeze up and call his wife into the room whenever a spider crossed his path. But whatever. They're so damn creepy-looking! If they didn't look the way they look, or have that creepy abililty to jump 6 feet, or to disappear seemingly into thin air only to reappear later, no one would fear them. But they do all those things and more, and they are creepy, and I hate them.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Spiders are good in gardens. If they're not in a garden, then they're out of place. What do we do with people who are out of place? ;->

dolor

Shannon said...

Uhhmmm... put them IN their place?? You're so cunning and sly.

melissa said...

Which Disney characters are you referring to?

Toys R Us isn't so bad! It gives me a lot of happy childhood memories. :)

Spiders...Ugh. I've never liked em. When I was little, my mom said there were spiders in Africa big enough to carry me away and it creeped me out a bit (such a gullible little thing).

Shannon said...

Hercules; Mulan; Aladdin... It seems to be an issue with title characters.

And erm, last time I checked, there ARE spiders large enough to carry a small child away... They're in the Amazon rain forest.